The Difference Between Fear and Anxiety and Why It Matters
I use fear and anxiety interchangeably all of the time. After all, it's triggering nearly the same part of the brain. For years as a clinician, I would never separate the two. I also know some people who always make it a point to separate them. And while they share huge similarities, there's a subtle difference that I think is incredibly helpful for Christians to know.
Defining Fear and Anxiety
The experience of feeling fear or anxiety is a perceived threat in the brain that causes the body to react emotionally, and oftentime behaviorally, as if it were in trouble. The brain loves to protect and in order to do so, it shoots off a flare gun, called "fear," every time it intercepts a threat. Some threats are legitimate, like when a car swerves in front of you on the freeway. Others are not, like being afraid to fall asleep after watching a scary movie. The feelings of fear and anxiety are incredibly similar: concern, nervous, jittery, worried, panicked, tense, frightened, scared. Here's the difference. With fear, there is a present and identifiable threat and with anxiety there is not.
An Identified Threat Vs. an Unidentified Threat
For example, let's say you're going to grab coffee with your friend because of your own wrongdoing. If she found out you hurt her in some way and now you have to face it, you would experience fear of what she might say. However, if you're not afraid of your friend but feel nervous, worried, or tense while talking to her, then what would be categorized as anxiety. You cannot identify a present threat. If you'll notice, fear usually has a cue. It does not simply come about without something setting it off. Anxiety does not play that way. Anxiety can come at Disney World on your favorite ride, in the safety of your own bedroom, in the stillness of Christmas morning. Anxiety doesn't care.
Even if there is a threat, it needs to be a reasonable one. If you feel that your husband will leave you and there's proof of an affair, that's fear. If your husband is kind, loving, and loyal yet you're still afraid he'll leave, that's anxiety. Anxiety typically lasts longer, is less emergent, and keeps you on edge for a longer period of time.
The Known Vs. The Unknown
A good way to talk about anxiety is the fear of the unknown. The brain triggers anxiety when it wants to protect you from the unknown, by making you feel uncomfortable, so that you will make the unknown, known. With fear, you're afraid of what you know. With anxiety, you're afraid of what you don't know. If your husband is kind, loving, and loyal your brain might still be afraid of the "what-if." Even when you can't voice being afraid of the "what-if," it's still there. For example, if you're grabbing coffee with a friend and feel anxious, you might be afraid of "what could go wrong," or oftentimes, "how will I mess this up?" Those thoughts may not be conscious, but your brain is still working behind the scenes with those worries.
Why Identifying Fear Matters
So this is the part that I love. God talks about fear and anxiety all of the time in the Bible. But, how often do you ever think of the difference between the two and what it means? For example, Psalm 23: 4 talks about the shadow of death. David declares that he won't feel fear. The word fear makes sense here, there is a present and identifiable threat. Deuteronomy 3:22 says, "You shall not fear them, for it is the Lord your God who fights for you." Another good example of a clear and present warning.
What are the moments in your life when you've faced a present, identifiable threat? A cancer diagnosis, a rocky marriage, a defiant child? The Lord says to not fear because he faces those battles. Sometimes the battle is won simply by passing through it with the Lord. Sometimes he fights for you when it's a battle to be conquered. Other times, he simply sets a table before you when the conquering has already been done.
Why Identifying Anxiety Matters
Proverbs 12:25 says, “An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.” Would it make sense to have a clear and present threat looming over someone and God solve it by a kind word? He can! But I don't know if he does. Clearly this word "anxious" is different than "fear". Luke 12:25-26 says "And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest?" This emphasizes our inability to control our future, the unknown, but God's sovereignty about what will happen in this life.
Knowing that anxiety is really a fear of the unknown can remind us of Jesus' final gift to us, peace. In John 16:33, Jesus says, "I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
How to Move Forward
First, ask yourself a few questions:
Do I have an identifiable and present threat?
Is the threat reasonable?
Would I label this fear or anxiety?
If it's fear, pray to God directly about the fear in your life. Are there any action steps He is leading you to make? Are there any actions that you should make without prompting simply because it's wise? Remember when Moses was waiting for God to part the sea and cries out to him. God responds, "Why are you crying out to me? Tell the Israelites to go forward." God will move but he also sovereignly gave us a brain to know when you move as well. Otherwise, wait for the Lord to direct you or fight for you.
If it's anxiety, pray to God directly about your fear of the unknown. Ask him to bring you peace and to whisper words to cheer you up. Ask him to settle your heart and even if he doesn't, to know the truth that God works all thing together for good, for the sake of those who love him (Romans 8:28).
Lastly, stay anchored, tethered, super-glued, to the Word of God and his truth. Want some free scripture cards? Find those here. God's Word is the best defense for fear and anxiety. It will ground you in the knowledge that God is who he says he is and will do what he says he will do. Want more insight? Check out this worksheet to help navigate fear vs. anxiety here.
